OfficeMax can DIAF. My company orders lots of generic office-supply-type stuff from them. Or at least we did until today. Two weeks ago, I ordered some labels. Usually, stuff shows up the next day with these guys; at most, three days. A week later, and still no labels. I call, and a really helpful person puts me on perma-hold, then tells me she’ll have to call me back.

Sure enough, later that day she calls and leaves a voicemail apologizing, with a new order number and says they’ll be there on tomorrow (Friday.) No problem, right? Shit happens sometimes and I’ll get my labels. Except they never show. On Monday, another call to support, another apology, another interminable hold, and an assurance that they will definitely be there later that afternoon. They use some local delivery company to get stuff from their stores to us, so unfortunately, a tracking number or anything substantial is out of the question.

Naturally, Monday passes and still no labels. Another call, another long hold time and I’m told they don’t actually know where my order is. I get a vague warning that another order might have to be placed to clear this up. If you’re keeping track, that would be the third order. <eyes rolling> I’m sure this one will go smoothly.</eyes rolling>

For some reason, this person seems to be getting annoyed at me on the phone, which I seriously cannot explain. I’ve been nothing but polite during this goat-fuck they call customer service. She’s explaining that an assistant will be calling me back. I start to ask when and she cuts me off with “Thanks for calling OfficeMax.” Except she hangs up mid-way through the last word. Bitch.

So I ordered the same labels from Amazon and used Prime to ship them overnight. We’ll see which one gets here first. My money is on Amazon.

And I’m never, ever buying anything from OfficeMax again.

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